Thursday, November 1, 2012

Again and again...

It was in the early morning hours. 
I heard the familiar creek of the old wooden floors. 
Footsteps to our bedroom door. 

"Mommy" Kolton whispers. 

"What wrong babe?" I whisper back.

"I messed up again." He walks into my outstretched arms.

Kolton, the last of our four.  My baby, now FIVE!  The only one who wouldn't take a fooler but only the edge of a silk and two small fingers in the mouth.  His comfort.

I pull him close.  "What did you mess up?"

"I sucked on my fingers"  He tucks his head in to my chest.

My heart ached for him.  He really is trying.  I know this feeling all too well.  How we fall into well-worn paths of comfort that we really are now too big for.  We should have pulled out of this rutted path by now...but we still tend to circle round and round.  It's what we've known.  Patterns of what was. 

I stroke his hair.  I pull his chin up to mine, tell him that it is try again. 

Through just enough light shining through the window, I see him smile. 

I whisper it soft into his ear.  "I love you, Kolton..."

"I wub you too, Mommy"

Footsteps run across the creaky old floors and hop back into bed.
Kolton age 2
This morning my devotional scripture:

But from there you will search again for the Lord your God. And if you search for him with all your heart and soul, you will find him. ~ Deuteronomy 4:29, NLT

From right where we any rutted worn path.  If we search for the Lord our God.  If we search for Him with all our heart and soul.  If we have to run to him over and over and tell Him we messed up -again.  We will find Him and His arms will be open wide!  He will pull us close.  Ask us to try again and always whisper I love you........

It's a promise.

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